18 January 2017

Huge Welcome to...

Hi lovelies, today I have a guest post from the lovely Jenna at The Minimalist Doula (on Instagram.) This is exactly what Bad Mum is all about and what I believe in! 



I am a recent mega fan of instagram.  As a Mum, it's a lovely virtual
world of escapism for five minutes (or fifty, whoops!) here and there
when I want some adult time amidst the constant demands of motherhood.
I think it has a real community feel to it and who doesn't love
scrolling through cool photos of complete randomness? As a doula it is
also a great space for me to hang out in the virtual sense and connect
with other like minded awesome people and learn from them too.

Before Christmas I noticed that everyone was doing a twelve days of
Christmas themed giveaway.  Lots of people were slashing their prices
or giving away free products through competitions and I liked the idea
of theming my posts leading up to Crimbo.  Some even cooler people
were giving away advice instead of gifts which as a recent minimalist
I especially loved and this got me thinking...I have no products to
offer as such, I always think of it as I offer feelings in my doula
work.  I give my Mamas non judgemental, unconditional loving support
which in turn creates positive and confident feelings of self belief.
So how could I turn this into a giveaway?  How could I turn love into
something tangible?

I decided that being real and unfiltered was the way to do this.
Those that see the perfectly styled and filtered pics and feel shitty
about themselves may feel a little better seeing something completely
unedited and may feel less alone.  A study conducted by psychologist
Dr Paula Durlofsky demonstrated a correlation between social media and
depression ( and around holidays like Christmas it
can get worse. So that's what I did.  For twelve days everything I
posted wasn't posed, cropped or filtered and I tried to show the
grittier side to motherhood rather than just the cutesie baby pics.

What did I discover from this process?  Well, as scary as it was
posting myself with no make up at 5am, it was well received.  People
seemed to like and appreciate this realer version of me.  I got a good
few likes and a few new followers. Naturally as a Mum, it was easy to
find funny/silly/crazy moments throughout the day because, well there
are lots of them!  I found out that it was ok to just be me, in all my
glory.  I didn't think before I posted my caption and try and rewrite
it, I just sent it out there into the virtual universe.  If I
questionned a post, I definitely hit send, because that was the point
right, to be real, no editing.  Funnily enough, they were always the
ones that got the best response.

Don't get me wrong, I love a good filter, I love the artistic
expression it adds to a picture, it can change the feeling of a photo
and it can change your feeling about that situation.  I personally
don't think there's anything wrong with improving yourself.  Why not
add a bit of 'amaro' to your life, in my eyes, it's just a way of
creating a positive vibe.  Choosing to see the good that day instead
of the bad.  But for those seeing the heavily filtered, styled images
and feeling inferior in some way, I don't think this is the intention
at all, it's just that instagrammer adding a bit of shine to their

It's funny though since this, I have rarely filtered my images and it
has become a bit of a New Year's goal to filter less.  I have in fact
noticed that life is pretty awesome just as it is.  When I look back,
I don't want to remember the chaos, the crazy, the shouting or the
sleeplessness.  I want to look back at my photos and see the love, the
happiness and the wonder, because it's there.  As hard as it is to be
a Mum, there are beautiful moments each and every day, but you have to
actively choose to see them.  You have to stop the daily grind of
chores and meals and school runs and you have to look at your sweet
babes and take some time to play.  So thank you instagram for these
little squares of love.   

Let's not judge each other, but #loveeachother and on the days when 
you can't choose love, choose prosecco.

Peace out & Doula love.

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