Bad Mum

Magazine

10 February 2017

Huge Welcome to...

Happy Friday everyone! 

Today I have lost my final day off due to my son being poorly again and this time he is worse. I wouldn't mind but next week is half term and we are stuck in together all week, with fuck all to do! Blah! Maybe being forced to move will work out and give us more to do in the holidays!

Any ho! Here is another great guest post from Laura (@mum_bore) about the ridiculous reasons kids refuse a meal at dinner time! 

Yes, we have all been there and this is funny - Bill from the Co Op! Haha!! 




This post is brought to you in association with 'Ridiculous reasons to refuse a meal' - by A Child

We all know the drill. Its tea time, they sit down, you place it in front of them.... you hold your breath.... and you wait.....
.... you wait for them to decide what the HELL is wrong with it this time!! 

Thought I would share the 10 most commonly used grounds (in our house), for delaying or outright refusing, their tea:

1. It's the wrong plate (or spoon...or fork). They want the Pink one, or the Blue one.... or the Princess one.... or basically whichever one you DON'T have. FFS!

2. You cut it up!!!
Game Over! Anyone who can come back from this deserves a knighthood!!

3. You didn't cut it up!
Retreats to a corner to rock back and forth muttering to yourself.

4. They want to eat it on the sofa.... watching tv. No way! Beans on toast on the sofa ain't happening kiddo.
10 mins later child is sat on a towel, on the sofa, eating beans on b**tard toast 

5. It doesn't look EXACTLY the same as last time they had it. (And I mean....EXACTLY!!!)

6. Its not what they decided (but never told you) they wanted. Their lack of communication is your fault.... obviously.

7. They need a drink first. One that is in a cup, the blue one, without a lid, but with a straw..... a RED straw!
(Grits teeth while muttering to oneself about them not being the only one that wants a drink!)

8. They don't want to sit next to/anywhere near their sibling. Cries of 'He's TOUCHING ME!!!' often ensue.

9. They want Daddy/Mummy/Granny/Bill from the co-op (or basically anyone who isn't currently within a 5 mile radius) and failure to produce said person will result in a hunger strike!

10. They have decided that after telling you repeatedly they DON'T need the toilet....that actually.... they do. And its a Poo.

So there you have it. These are the obstacles that face many a parent at any chosen meal time. EVERY. DAY.

So.....if your child/children have eaten their tea tonight, take a bloody bow!!! You have satisfied all of the above RIDICULOUS criteria.

Welcome to parenthood!!

You Rock!! 


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